Sometimes the struggles we face in life can be so overwhelming. Little things that really should be the little things sometimes seem like mountains too high to climb. That is how life seems to be for us lately. I wish that losing Laney had been the last big trial and that we would handle all of the little things easier. And that is true for the most part. The little things really are just little things when compared to the BIG things.
As we struggle through yet another trial that seems to almost too much to even face, I try to remember what Elder Quentin L. Cook has told us: “Righteousness, prayer, and faithfulness will not always result in happy endings in mortality. Many will experience severe trials. When this happens, the very act of having faith … is approved by God.” Heavenly Father has told us that “Thy days are known, and thy years shall not be numbered less; therefore, fear not … , for God shall be with you forever and ever.”
As we continue to pray and be faithful, I know that having faith is enough for now. I also know that He knows our struggles and knowing this helps me to keep on keeping on. To find the courage to try again tomorrow. And the day after, and the day after.
Someone asked me one time how we were making it through such a difficult time. I told them that we try to look for the blessings that we receive every single day. And they are there. We have seen them, and know we will continue to see them as long as we stay close to the Spirit and allow ourselves to feel of Heavenly Father’s love for us.
I got woken up this morning by one of those blessings. It was one of those that makes you know that our loved ones are around us. Continuing to help us and bless our lives. It didn’t happen to me, but to one of my girls. And I will forever be grateful for a Heavenly Father who knows us by name and cares about us each individually.
One of my daughters has been very sick, unable to eat and very nauseous. We have been baffled and so have the doctors. So we have been at a loss as to what to do. Until this morning. Heavenly Father let us know that there was a specific thing that was causing the problem. And the Spirit tells me that it is true.
Such a great way to start the day. Knowing that if we stay close to the Spirit, He will indeed help us to see the blessings. I know He gives them to us. Everyday. And I will keep looking for them.
I got a text the other morning from my husband about what sounded good for dinner. He wanted stuffed meatballs. It did sound good. I haven’t made them in a while. So on the way home from work, I got thinking about what I needed to pick up at the store in order to make them. And then it hit me. Stuffed meatballs have STUFFING in them. Just the thought of stuffing sent tears to my eyes and down my face. Laney LOVED stuffing. We always had to keep some in the house for her so she could have it for a snack or if she didn’t like what I made for dinner.
Once I got the stuffed meatballs in the oven, I ran up to the cemetery to take up the beautiful fall arrangement that I wanted to put by her headstone. And it hit me like a ton of bricks when I saw that someone had tucked a white handkerchief into the vase on her headstone.
Last Sunday, we went to the Brigham City temple dedication. We had white handkerchiefs that we took with us. Someone had left theirs at the cemetery. I was completely lost when I found it on her headstone. I sat there and cried while thinking about how much Laney would have loved being there with us. Oh, I know that she WAS with us, but I would have loved to see her face and her joy at the temple she had loved so much was dedicated. I love that whoever left that handkerchief knew how much the temple meant to Laney and to our family. Simply amazing. I love the people in our lives. Thank you for remembering Laney. And us.