I have been thinking about Jens for the last couple of weeks as we come upon the year mark. I know it is such a hard time for him, too. But I have mostly been thinking about what he did for us, what he did for Laney.
I am going to put it out there that Jens is the guy every mother wishes their daughter would marry. While we know that will have to wait a little while, we still have him in our lives, and still love him as though her were our son. We all used to laugh that she would say that we loved him more than she did. She was too nervous to tell him she loved him, so she painted her nails, hoping he would know it was for him. Here is the picture:
But it was really Jens who loved her the most. At a time when we, as her parents could not be there for our daughter, he was. He knew exactly what to do for her, what power to call upon first. We will forever be grateful to him for that. For everything he did on the mountain that day. And what he still does for our family, everyday since. For remembering. For bringing peace into our lives. For loving Laney so much that he wanted her to be his for eternity. For knowing that Heavenly Father will work it all out in the end. For knowing that she will still be his. Never forget how much she loves you. Still.
This picture reminds me of how happy you guys were, and will be again someday. Thank you for making her so incredibly happy. We loved you then, and love you still. We always have, and always will.
Laney has always had very good taste in friends. She seemed to find the cream of the crop. Brynna hung out with Laney and her friends, so it was only natural that Laney’s friends would keep being there for Brynna. So it has been with one of Laney’s friends named Kurtis.
Kurtis is a great guy who has been there for Brynna through so many rough things. Just this last week he held her in the hospital half the night while she cried in pain-until she fell asleep. Then yesterday he took her to the temple to do baptisms, out to lunch, and over to spend the day with his family.
Did I mention that Kurtis is leaving on his mission next week? He is making time for Brynna because he knows how much she needs him right now. But he has been there for our family, too. He has come over just to visit. We love it because it helps bring us peace.
But this post is for Kurtis. I want him to know how amazingly proud I am of him for choosing to help others learn that they can have their families forever, just like we can. He is going to be a great missionary. I want him to know that I love him, too, for helping Brynna. For being her friend. For coming to my house, flopping in the chair, grabbing the guitar and being part of the family. The chair will be here waiting for you to get back. But in the meantime, never forget how incredibly proud Laney is of you, too. She will be there when you need her encouragement, I am sure. Just like she would have been anyway. Don’t forget to write!
I have been thinking for a while now about what I wanted to do in the month of August for Laney. Since August will be such a difficult month, I wanted to do something that Lane would love. So I am going to put nothing but white flowers on her headstone for the whole month.
With the Brigham CIty Temple open house starting this month…I think white is a perfect tribute to both her life,and where she is. She loved the every temple, but was so extremely excited about “our” temple. I have noticed that when some people mark the passing of another year, they put black flowers on a memorial. I knew then that we would do the opposite. Because we know how sweet the Plan of Salvation is. Because white means purity. Heaven. Faith. Knowledge. Eternal life. Hope.
We want to have hope leading into this next month. We are going to need it as we try to put one foot in front of the other. We can do this. We can have courage to face each day. Kinda like the little engine that could….